Everyone, say hello to my new friend, Jenny

If someone asked me to pay $10,000 today so that I could be 40 pounds lighter tomorrow, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Literally. If that were the offer, I'd jump on it so fast my tummy would jiggle. In fact, I'd probably pay MORE than that. Put it on my equity line. Put it on a credit card. Whatever. If someone could make it that easy for me to lose the weight, I'd pay a lot.

I'm tired. Tired of looking at all the smaller, more stylish clothes in my closet that I can't wear. Tired of trying to find one more cute black top at the mall. Tired of clasping my hands in front of myself to hide my tummy. Tired of wearing maternity shorts when my baby is already 15 months old. Tired of carrying around an imaginary due date in my head to quote to strangers in case they ask me when I'm due. Because it is as distinctly embarrassing -- if not MORE embarrassing -- to be the askee of that question as it is to be the asker of that question. NO ONE wants to have a reason to say, "Sorry, I'm not pregnant."

I've lost 30 pounds three times now. The first time was when we were trying to get pregnant with Nathaniel and I wanted to be as healthy as possible. The second time was after I had him. The third time was after I had Nicholas. And now, here I am again. So I know I can do it. It's going to take me probably six months, but I can do it. I just really need it to be EASIER this time.

I wanted to basically have everything ready for me to eat, so I just have to throw it in my bag when I leave every morning. Well, THAT'S not gonna happen, no matter what program I'm on, I suppose. I'll have to do some sort of prep work -- whether throwing together a small side salad or washing veggies -- whether I'm simply counting Points on my own or following a formal program. But I'm choosing Jenny Craig, and I hope it goes well. Valerie Bertinelli, you have inspired me.

I bought this:



Which, as you can see, had a huge dent in it, right out of the box. But once you get one of these out of the store, into your car, out of your car, into your house, out of the box, and in the right spot, you're not returning it because of a small dent. AND THEY KNOW THAT.



Once it was in place, I put all of this in it:

I started the program on Monday of this week, and I don't talk to my counselor again until Tuesday the 4th. I'm seriously going to try not to blog about it except once a week, probably on Tuesdays when I have any news to report. (And hopefully it will always be good news.) No one wants to hear me gripe about food every day, I'm quite sure.

What I can tell you so far: The food isn't bad, but the portions are small. VERY SMALL. My desire to eat has been stripped away. Whereas I used to look forward to meals, now when it's time to eat, I wish it weren't. Cake and cookie have now taken on new meaning. They are now spoken as "cake" and "cookie," with air quotes. The cakes and cookies that are part of the program couldn't be called cakes and cookies in a non-dieting world. Plus, I'm hungry pretty much all the time. So far, the six-small-meals-a-day approach isn't really working that well for me. (I was going to post a disclaimer that clearly stated that I'm not being paid to blog about Jenny Craig, but I think that paragraph just accomplished that for me.)

But I'm on board the train. I'm not cheating. (Day 5 is almost over. Woo hoo!) And no, I'm not posting a "Before" picture in profile, not in this lifetime. No "After" bikini shot, either. NO SIREE BOB.

Wish me luck.

TargetWatch '09: The wait is killing me

Get ready, Grass Stains readers!

This fall, when SuperTarget opens in my neighborhood, I will be celebrating big-time. And I want you to be able to celebrate with me ... because it will be so much more fun to share it with all 12 of you.


At the store's grand opening, I will purchase a $100 Target gift card to give away to one of my readers. But, here's the thing ... sometimes when people do giveaways, they have LOTS more people than normal read their post for that day and try to win the gift item. And while that's great and all, I'd just love for one of you who drops by every day to get it.

So, I'm going to keep it on the down-low. I'm not going to ask you to spread the word. Just keep reading -- and commenting occasionally, so I know who you are -- and we'll hope for the best. (I'm certainly not going to PREVENT the random winner from winning, whether I know you or not; I'm just sayin'.) Sure, I'd love for you to refer me to your friends as a good read, but not just for the giveaway. But start sending them over now, if you want to send them at all, so they can get to know me a little bit before The Big Day.

Now EVERYONE has something to look forward to when my SuperTarget opens! Good times.

I am here for you

Tomorrow is (apparently) National Cheesecake Day.




If you dine-in tomorrow at Cheesecake Factory, you can get any cheesecake for half price. (I think the dining-in part is mandatory.) Click here for all the fine print.

ENJOY it for me; I'm going to have to skip it. More on that later this week.

Stylin' in his new shoes

When I discovered two bloody blisters on Jake's left foot, I decided it was high time to replace his shoes. (I'm nothing if not an attentive parent.)

I took the boys to the mall (the Stride-Rite is the only place I can find open past 5:00 that carries XW shoes) after work, and we made our presence known in ways that only we can.

Jake was THRILLED to find a pair of faux-Crocs that fit his very fat, juicy feet.



And I must say, they are WAY cuter than real Crocs! They look like crocodiles. Precious.

Because I didn't have socks with me (because I wasn't letting Jake wear his old shoes after I discovered his blisters), I had to buy socks in the store.

"Hello, nice shoe lady. Let me take those socks off your hands for you. I just LOVE what you picked out ... they match my shirt perfectly!"

"Here, you can have them back so I can properly assess the shoes."

"I'm diggin' the shoes."

"I LOVE this shoe lady! She is totally into me."

"I'm just gonna play for a minute over here while you pay."

"I'm PAST ready to go. I'm hungry. Let's split."

After we finished up at the shoe store, we headed down to the food court to grab a bite to eat. I let Nick handle his own ketchup, from tearing open the packets to putting it on his "plate." You can see that it went well, if you count 50 percent of the ketchup hitting the plate as "going well."

There was plenty on the table, but did you notice where ELSE it ended up?

THAT'S RIGHT, ON THE COLUMN NEXT TO OUR TABLE.

It looked like a crime scene with its spatters and smudge.

After they finished eating, they asked for a treat and since -- aside from the column splattering -- they'd done so well, I bought the big boys Chick-fil-A Ice Dreams in to-go cups. They followed me and Jake in a little ice cream parade through Belk. We hit the store entrance ...

Followed by the shoe department ...

Followed by cosmetics ...

And jewelry, where Nick asked me to take his picture with his Ice Dream.

And the whole time, Jakey sat turned around in his stroller, watching them eat. It was sort of a pitiful sight.

But he has some sort of an infection, and I didn't want them sharing with him and possibly getting it. Poor, deprived baby.

But he DID get two new pairs of shoes, and hopefully his blisters will heal really quickly. So sorry, baby!

FaceBook bonus

I read one of the funniest things just now on FaceBook that I've seen since I joined. One of my friends posted her status, and a mutual friend responded:

Bonnie: Poor Daniel! Two days after his birthday, his fish dies! (No, it wasn't a birthday present. It made it since Christmas. That is a fish record for us!) I guess it is off to find a new fish tomorrow.

Starla: I won a fish one time at a carnival. My mom made me keep it in a recycled cool whip bowl and feed it dry grits. Goldie was a fighter....he/she lived for years. Did you over-pamper your fish with a fish bowl & fish food?


COOL WHIP BOWL? DRY GRITS? I have GOT to meet her mom.

Fresh-air artwork

I've found the Disney Store online outlet to be a great place to get gifts for kids once they go on clearance.

I'm on the lookout pretty much year-round, because we are responsible for taking 13 gifts to the beach each year to celebrate all the kids' birthdays together. They're supposed to be as similar as possible -- if not identical -- to reduce infighting, and this year I was thrilled to find Disney character acrylic paint sets on sale for $3.99 each back around Christmas. I quickly grabbed a whole collection of them and saved them for the beach.

Nathaniel and Nicholas have been dying to work on theirs, so I finally pulled them out, covered the table on the deck with newspaper, and let them go at it.

Nathaniel worked on Buzz Lightyear.



Nick worked on Mickey and Pluto.

They painted and painted and painted for over an hour, trying to get everything "just right."

To me, this is even better than the paint-by-numbers things we did when I was growing up. The canvas (real canvas!) has the colors you're supposed to use printed very lightly on it, and you just paint right over it.

They were so proud of their creations! I hung them up on nails in the playroom so they can admire their handiwork daily.

We may not be budding professional artists, but it was a great way to spend a summer evening!

Please pray for Stellan

Of all the sick children I've read about or linked to from the blogs I read daily, Stellan is the only one (aside from Jonah, of course) whom I've felt absolutely compelled to include on my sidebar as a reminder to myself (and hopefully others) to pray for him every chance I get.

He is struggling today. He is weak, he is sick, and I am teary-eyed over his plight.

Please, please take a moment now and say a prayer for Stellan, his family and his doctors. Thank you.

Saying goodbye to an extraordinary woman

I have always wondered what it would be like to be extraordinary.

I'm not talking about being good at the basics of life. I mean, people compliment me occasionally on being able to do a lot of things in a short amount of time, or tell me I have a nice singing voice, or comment on the fact that they think I'm a good friend. None of that counts as extraordinary, even within the confines of my little life.

I'm talking about people who will long be remembered for the mark they left on the world, whether it's as an artist, a political figure, a writer, a philanthropist or an athlete. And there are certainly many extraordinary people who aren't in the public spotlight or aren't well-known outside of a specific geographic area.

I had the privilege of attending the memorial service of one of those quieter Extraordinary People last week. My friend Mandy's mother died this month after a heroic, inspiring 11-year battle with cancer. And while I know Mandy much better than I knew Jan, I have been inspired by Jan's faith and courage in the face of that dreaded disease ever since I met her 10 years ago.

A few years ago, Jan and her husband Alex moved to Florida to retire and enjoy the rest of their days together. So when she passed away, they first had a funeral in Florida and buried her there, which was her wish. But there were so many people in Birmingham who loved her so dearly, the entire family drove here for a second service at our church. It was packed to the edges of the room.

During the joyful service -- a celebration of Jan's life, just as she wanted it to be -- I was struck by a few things in particular that I felt compelled to write down.

First, as our pastor was speaking about Jan, he said that something he always noticed about Jan was that -- no matter her circumstances -- she never allowed herself to be The Point. And because in this day and age, so many people's sole objective seems to be to make themselves the point -- of every situation or conversation -- this observation really resonated with me.

Second, her husband Alex said that at some point during her fight with cancer, she told him, "I am so GLAD that I have stage 4 breast cancer." And he asked incredibly, "WHY?" And she answered, "Because it allows me to minister to other women who have it in a way that I would never have otherwise been able to." I can tell you right here, right now, I AM NOT THAT SELFLESS. I'd love to be that person, but I'm not.

Third (and I can't remember whether it was Alex or Mandy who noted this in their remarks), Jan operated under the philosophy, "Don't waste your suffering." Mandy said it's based on James 1, and Jan truly lived by it. She was a champion for a cure for cancer and ministered to so many other people who live with it day in, day out. She was instrumental in the launch and ongoing ministry of the Angel Squad, which provides one-on-one support to breast cancer patients and their caregivers in Birmingham. She wasted not one minute of her suffering. If more "well people" gave as much of themselves every day as Jan did while she was sick, this world would be a remarkably different place.

Jan leaves behind quite a legacy of beautiful, healthy, talented children and grandchildren who are great assets to the world. Beyond the gifts she left the medical community, she left the rest of us the amazing gift of her family.

And to them I say, Jan was extraordinary in every way. It was an honor to have been invited to celebrate her life with you, and I am heartened to know that today she is dancing with the Father, officially now part of His true Angel Squad. God bless and God speed.

Ready, aim, fire

There's just nothing like a good, old-fashioned water balloon fight.

I found a few packs of water balloons last summer at the Dollar Store and stocked up on them. This week the boys wanted to pull some out, fill them up and launch them at each other.

Here's Nathaniel by his freshly filled ammunition. THAT IS A LOOK OF PRIDE.

And here's Nick with his pile. THAT IS A LOOK OF ANTICIPATION. The anticipation of condoned, sustained violence, of the glory of being wet in the summertime, of possibly maiming one's brother. His joy knows no bounds.

They took a couple of practice throws to get ready.

And then it began. I didn't want to subject anyone to the full battle, but I captured a couple of minutes of it.

Laughter, tears and welts were all a part of the afternoon. I'm pretty sure they don't think it could have gone any better.

Jake, the soccer star

Jake is actually much better at kicking the soccer ball than he appears to be in this video, but you know how it is with kids and video cameras. You take what you can get. Or, as Nick says, "You get what you get and you don't pitch a fit!"

So, even though he can dribble the ball the length of the den and appears at all other times to be the next David Beckham, I now present to you a brief video of Jake connecting solidly with the ball once.

Grinning from ear to ear

OK, if this doesn't make you grin, there's just nothing I can do for you. You are irredeemable. (Melanie M., that means "hopeless." Ha!)

This couple was on The Today Show this morning, and I think their entire wedding party is supposed to be on tomorrow morning.

RECORD IT, PEOPLE.

These are some fun-lovin' folks.

Failing fantastically

Fail Blog routinely posts some real winners. For whatever reason, several of today's entries absolutely tickled me.

They call this one "Hat Fail," but I personally don't think the HAT is the one in the picture that's failing.




This one is titled "Bouncy Slide Fail," with good reason.




I think it would have been a better choice to design the slide wherein the children would come sliding out the dog's mouth, but whatever.

And this one is titled "Educational Software Sign Fail," and I believe that is a totally appropriate title. My word.

15 months and counting

It's hard to believe that little Jakey is already 15 months old! The time since he was born has flown by more quickly than any other year I can remember. We went earlier this week for his 15-month checkup at the pediatrician's office. Our regular pediatrician, Dr. Amy, wasn't there, so we saw her partner, Dr. Malone.


"What is this thing? I'm WAY to big for it."






"While I'm waiting on you to do WHATEVER, I'll just pinch myself and see if I can figure out my BMI. No hurry."

"How long til Dr. Malone comes in? I'm fine. I'll just play with this tissue."

"OMG, I LOVE TISSUES. I could play with them all day." [Rip, rip, rip. Shred, shred, shred.]

"Seriously, I'm just going to make myself comfortable and keep shredding until he walks in the door."

"I can make lots of different shapes."

"I can make a BIG MESS."

"THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME."

"Do I have to quit? Please don't make me quit."

"HI, Dr. Malone! I love it when you listen to my chest. Nice watch. Also, sorry I ripped the pop-up Elmo out of your book."

"Can I please rip the stethoscope out of your ear? No? You ruin all my fun."

"And then you go and want to look in my ears! THE NERVE."

"I could totally do without this. GET THAT THING OUT OF MY EAR."

"I forgive you, for now. But I can hold a grudge with the best of 'em, so watch out NEXT time, Buster."

Lots of DIY projects on display

If you're a Do-it-Yourselfer and love looking at other people's projects, head on over to A Soft Place to Land today. Kimba is hosting a DIY party, and we're all invited!

If you're visiting from ASPTL, please click here to see how we helped some friends of ours paint their kitchen cabinets and wood floors. You can also click here to see how I went about hanging some plates on my own kitchen walls.

Welcome to Grass Stains!

It's the little things

I drove up to get gas yesterday at one of my regular gas stations, the one on the way to work. And as I drove up to the pumps, I was like, JUMP BACK.



They were so new, they were practically SHINING. Everything that was wrong with the old ones, is right with the new ones.

My pump was graffiti-less. Smudgeless. Pristine. I must have been within the first 50 users.




Huge buttons IN GRADE ORDER, not one of those tricky pumps that puts the regular-grade gas in the middle, so that when you punch the button to the far left you end up paying for mid-grade or high-grade gas. SNEAKY.

A big display that tells you how much gas you're pumping and how much money you're hemorrhaging. I didn't have to squint to read it.

Buttons for entering your debit card PIN or ZIP Code for security purposes. Numbers legible? Check. Enter and Clear buttons clearly marked? Check. Absence of other confusing buttons? Check.

Clearly this is the gas station version of THIS:

I'm a HUGE FAN. This will no longer be my gas station on the way to work. It will be my Gas Station of Choice.

Assuming, of course, that I'm not tackled to the ground the next time I get out to pump my gas because I've been put on the Terrorist Watchlist for taking 20 pictures of the gas pump last time I was there.

Take me out to the ballgame ... sort of

While my family was here, Nathaniel and Nicholas took the opportunity to pull Dad out to the backyard to show off their baseball skills. They don't play on a team, and they've had no practice, but they sure do love it.

Nathaniel wanted to practice catching with a mitt on.

There's just nothing like playing catch in no pants, y'all.

Nick wanted to practice batting. Batting in Little Einsteins PJs at 2 p.m. runs a close second to the thrill of playing catch in your undies.

Next, Nick took a turn pitching to Nathaniel.

And I use the term "pitching" loosely. (See the video below. We're lucky Nathaniel still has all his teeth.)

Soon afterward, it was Nick's turn at bat.

And finally, Dad ("Pop") pitched to Nathaniel. And Nathaniel got to run the "bases."

It was a glorious summer day, unusually dry and "cool" (in the mid-80s). Great day for running around willy-nilly in your skivvies. Just ask my boys.

Family is the greatest gift of all

My sister flew in for a visit last week from her home in Jackson, Wyo., and I was so sad to see her go on Sunday afternoon. We won't see her again until Christmas, and twice a year simply isn't often enough!

My parents were here for the second half of the week, as well, and the boys loved having so many people around to lavish attention on them! They've had a July so full of love and laughter with all of their favorite people, first at the beach and then here at home.

Sunday afternoon we tried to get some good pictures of the kids with Sarah Ellen. We were roughly 70 percent successful.

Note to parents trying to get young boys to smile: Just because you hear them saying "CHEESE" doesn't mean that the expression on their face is a smile.



Note to self: Just because you THINK you've hidden your socks-with-Crocs behind your back doesn't mean that you were SUCCESSFUL.



Mom had already driven home by the time we finally got around to taking pictures, but we got one with Dad.

I am short.

After we finished with pictures, the boys ALL wanted to jump on the trampoline. However, Jakey isn't quite there yet. He needs a lot of one-on-one time with the trampoline before he will reach anything resembling competence, and unfortunately, he's never been granted time on the trampoline alone. THESE TWO OTHER GUYS ALWAYS GET IN THE WAY.

Luckily he thinks they're a real hoot.



He just laughs and laughs at their antics.



Quick! Somebody get me a spoon. I have to eat this one up.



Nathaniel and Nick have been jumping for so many years that they just go crazy out there. Lately they've taught themselves how to do front flips. I wish I'd gotten a picture of that, but I didn't. Maybe next weekend.





Probably just a few more months until this one will DEMAND to jump on the trampoline.



WHERE DOES THE TIME GO?

He comes from smart stock

It's summertime, the season of cookouts with family and friends. And at our house, that means Family-size Bags of Chips in the pantry.

Seeing these in our pantry last weekend (sour cream and onion -- yum!) reminded me of this trick that I learned from Grayson's mom Elaine back when he and I started dating.



They lived right on the edge of our college campus, and I used to go over to their house for lunch a couple of days a week. Grayson had graduated and started a job, and he came home every day for lunch. I was a senior and totally up for free food, which Elaine offered any day I was able to walk over before afternoon classes.

One day I was mystified when Elaine got out her kitchen shears and cut four inches off the top of the chip bag.

Me: "What are you doing?"

Elaine: "When Lanky [that's what she called Grayson] and Rudy have eaten half the chips out of the bag, I cut the top half off so they don't have to reach their arms all the way in to get the rest of the chips out next time."

Me: "THAT IS BRILLIANT."

And we practice that little tip to this day. It is one of those things that will improve your life by .002 percent, and I recommend that you try it.

I could pretend to be a morning person for this

Tuesday morning you can get a free pastry with the purchase of any beverage at participating Starbucks locations.


Click here to print the coupon! (Thanks to my friend Doran for the tip.)

Beep beep!

I was driving down the highway recently (before our beach trip) when I noticed this Bud Light truck.



Not being a beer drinker, I probably wouldn't have paid any attention to it if my eyes hadn't locked on the lettering at the far right.



"Sound horn. I'll pull over."

I was absolutely intrigued. We were going 70 miles per hour, and I REALLY wondered what would happen if I honked at him. Would he pull over on the side of the interstate and sell me some beer right off of his truck? THAT IS SERVICE.

I cannot TELL you how badly I wanted to honk at him, just to see what would happen. But I was truly in a hurry to get to the other side of town, and I just didn't have time. Of course, NOW every time I get in the car I'm looking for a Bud Light truck so I can honk at it.

I HAVE TO KNOW.

Does anyone hear some heavy breathing?

There's something just a little bit "off" about this picture, but I can't put my finger on it.




Huh. I guess it'll come to me eventually.

Touring: the master bedroom

I don't have pictures to share of a really cute kids' party, but I thought I'd jump in to Kelly's Show Us Where You Live Friday tour and just do what she did a few weeks ago (that I didn't get around to in time), which is the master bedroom.

When you walk in our bedroom door, you're thisclose to the foot of our bed. Smallish room, biggish bed. Didn't someone once say that a king-size bed is the key to a happy marriage? THEY WERE SO RIGHT.

Biggest regret in this room: That I didn't hang the curtain rods six inches higher.

Second biggest regret in this room: That I'm too lazy to do it now.

I keep my slippers by the side of the bed at all times. They're comfy Deerfoams that I bought at Costco. The quilt is from (you know it) Pottery Barn, and the giclee print above the bed is from art.com.


I loved the print when I first saw it, and I haven't gotten tired of it yet, after a couple of years. I guess art in the bedroom is something that you actually don't spend that much time with, especially if it hangs over your bed. So in that respect, I guess I might never get tired of it.


My bedside table is home to the alarm clock that doesn't do a very good job of waking me up, my table lamp by which I love to read (great soft light that is due more to the lightbulb than the lamp, but the lamp is prettier so I give it all the credit), the video monitor that gives me a view of Jake's crib, and the ever-changing stacks of books I'm always wading through. (Read any Lee Child? HE'S GREAT.) There is also a moderate level of dust on the table -- and every other surface in the house. Sorry. I should have wiped it down for the picture, at least.



The bedside table also holds my trusty remotes. I, of course, love my TiVo like no other material possession, and the overhead fan remote is a lifesaver, too. If you are taller than 5'2", you may not be concerned with turning on your fan ... it may come easily to you. However, I am very short and the fan is mounted over our bed. I either have to climb all the way up on the bed to turn it on or use the remote. I choose the remote.



To the left of the door when you walk in, and directly in front of the bed, is Grayson's dresser. It holds the big TV, TiVo, a DVD player and Grayson's alarm clock, which he has to get out of bed to turn off. No turning it off and rolling over for him. Nope ... he has to walk over there and turn it off. He's been telling me for years that I should do that, too, but I just can't.



Hanging above the dresser is a beautiful watercolor painted by a talented artist who attends our church. I bought it at a silent auction earlier this year, and I just love it.



To the right of our bed is my chest of drawers, which is topped by lots of pictures of friends and family. I've been trying to declutter, but I can't seem to part with all of my framed pictures. There are piles of boxes to the left and right of my chest of drawers, mostly things I'm donating in the aforementioned Great Decluttering of Aught-Nine.


That's pretty much it for our bedroom! It's modest but cozy, and it's our little haven in the house when we need some quiet moments!

A sweet welcome

This is primarily for my sister and parents, but you're welcome to watch it if you'd like.

My mom asked me to try to get pictures as my sister arrived (we hadn't seen her since Christmas). I grabbed the video camera and recorded a couple of minutes of the excitement.

It was mid-afternoon and yep, the kids were still in their PJs. And Jake still wasn't in pants.

Classic Jakey

Yesterday Jake REALLY lucked out and found two chocolate milk boxes sitting within reach on the kitchen table.

He isn't allowed to drink juice boxes, milk boxes, or chocolate milk at all, so he totally jumped at the opportunity and started sucking those straws as if his life depended on it.


When I looked over at him, I had to laugh at the many classic Jake elements in this picture ...

- Red lump from head injury on left side of head, check.
- Double-fisted death grip on forbidden items, check.
- Drool soaking shirt from neck to navel, check.
- Shorts, check. (WAIT A MINUTE! THIS KID NEVER WEARS SHORTS.)
- Two fat rolls where each cankle meets each foot, check.
- Little monkey toes gripping the floor tiles to ensure maximum grippage and plant self firmly to keep forbidden items from being taken away, check.
- Precious "Who, me?" look on face to distract from the fact that he is drinking chocolate milk, check.

I LOVE THAT KID.

Climbing, et cetera

My sister is here this week, and my parents arrive tomorrow night. I might be slower to post while they're here, and because I'm working, I probably won't have many pictures until the weekend.

But to tide you over, here are some pictures of the boys with "Gigi" (short for "Great Grandmother"), because they know it's so important to get pictures with her every time we visit, as well of several of them climbing trees and running around her backyard last week when we visited her on the way to the beach.


I love these pictures of her with the boys, because they were just having fun with her, and they were making each other laugh.

These sweet moments with their Gigi make me so happy, that they'll have this to look back on one day when she's gone. I wish we'd been able to spend more than just a few hours with her over two days, but her arthritis has been making things difficult for her, and the energy that we bring with us is overwhelming for her.

She DOES love to watch them play in her backyard, though, and they are happy to oblige. It's nice to let them run out some of their energy before we get back in the car, and she has a wonderful climbing tree that they remember from year to year.

Nathaniel started out by showing Jake the ropes, since he was only 12 weeks old the last time we were there.

And by "ropes," I mean "bushes."

Nick wasted no time getting up that tree.

Nathaniel joined him as soon as he felt like Jake was OK by himself wandering the perimeter.



Up and down the tree they climbed, levering themselves out on branches and dropping to the ground. Jake continued to explore.

Once Jake had tired of the 100-degree weather, he came racing toward me as fast as his little legs would allow him to toddle so that I could take him inside to see how child-proof Gigi's house was (not).

Traveling, playing and tree climbing ... synonymous with summer to us ...

Creating a color story for your vacation

The quality of the pictures in this post is terrible, so I apologize for that right off the bat. I took them in our hotel room on the way to the beach sometime after midnight with the lights out when the boys were already asleep.

Since I just unpacked all of our clothes for the beach, I experienced the reverse flashes of red, white and blue that I enjoyed while I was packing for the trip.

So I thought I'd share a tip that is very applicable for scrapbookers, but also for people who just like to think ahead.

Creating a "color story" for your vacation -- just as designers would do in your home -- makes for beautiful pictures and easy scrapbook paper coordination once you get home. For example, when I pack for our beach vacation -- which always occurs over July 4th week -- I pack clothes with a patriotic color story in mind. I pack neutral shorts with shirts in shades of red, white and blue, usually some striped and some solid. Here's what I packed for last week:

NATHANIEL

NICHOLAS

JAKE

If you pack this way, the people in the pictures will almost always coordinate well, and getting a picture back and noticing that you match ("Hey, we match!") will no longer be a happy accident.

You might think that your family members don't have enough of any color or set of colors in your closets to make this work, but you probably do. And even if you have girls, for instance, and you're trying to pack for Thanksgiving, think about going with pink, green and chocolate for your key colors. You don't have to use orange, gold and brown to "say" Thanksgiving in your pictures.

Blue has become more widely used in Christmas decorations in recent years. Blue, red and green or blue, red and purple can make beautiful Christmas pictures. And of course you can't go wrong with the traditional red and green, and usually everyone in a family has SOMETHING they can throw on in one of those colors (or white) for a big family picture.

And when it comes to scrapbooking, today they're making more papers and stickers in new, different combinations than they ever have before. I've been known to choose what papers and embellishments I'd like to use, and then pack for our trip accordingly.

It might sound high-maintenance, but once you start thinking this way, it becomes second nature. (Just ask Grayson, who once wore an orange shirt to a 4th of July cookout on a farm. It made the scrapbook page impossible. He always checks with me before we leave the house now.)

You can revisit some of the beach posts here, here and here to see how the color story worked this year if you'd like.

Home again, home again, jiggity-jig

Our ride home over the weekend was a mix of uneventful and eventful. "Eventful" only if you consider terrible traffic jams on a holiday weekend eventful.

As we left Garden City Beach (south of Myrtle Beach, S.C.) on Saturday morning, everything was a little slow, but not too bad. That changed as we approached Aynor, which is a one-stoplight town, but that one stoplight is a baddie. Here we are, still miles from Aynor, going zero to five miles per hour for about an hour.



How enthralled are you with my picture of traffic? Now that we've left the beach, I've got nothin'. So I guess you'd better get used to it.

Shortly after we cleared the traffic jam, we passed my all-time favorite South Carolina produce sign. (Between Myrtle Beach and Florence, you pass roughly 2,000 of them, so there are many from which to choose.)



They really went out of their way to give us a unique misspelling of Peaches. Not PEACH'S. Not PEACHS. Not PEACHES'. PEACHE'S. While errors like this typically drive me crazy, this one just makes me laugh. It's far too wrong to get mad about.

Unlike those of us suffering the indignities of traffic and bad punctuation all day Saturday, the back-seaters were pretty well entertained. Nathaniel played PSP and Leapster games, Nick watched movies and Jake slept.



There are few things cuter than a baby conked out in his seat with his neck all cattywampus.



He would have been lonely all by himself in the middle row, but he had his thighs for company.



As we got into Georgia on Saturday afternoon, we stopped for gas at this BP gas station. (That one sentence takes blogging to an all-time low.)



But the point of the pervious sentence was to set the scene for this:



Apparently this BP gas station has the "best hot food in town, dine in or carry out," and they also boast "bait and tackle supplies." I COULD NOT BRING MYSELF TO GO INSIDE, even for the purpose of blogging. I was just too scared. I'm sorry that I have failed you.

Not 15 minutes after we left the BP, we came to a screeching halt.



Traffic was stopped for miles in both directions.



Unlike the traffic jam in South Carolina, while stuck in this one, we didn't move an inch. We sat in the same place for almost an hour, in quite a bit of heat.

See that 18-wheeler and car below trying to merge unsuccessfully into the non-moving traffic lanes?


Well, I whipped over onto the shoulder and did a U-turn to drive the wrong way up that ramp. I have never done that in my life, but it was totally worth it. Even when I ran into the state trooper with his lights on at the top of the ramp. He let me go right on by. I think he saw the rooftop carrier, the Alabama plates and a minivan packed to within an inch of its life and decided we had endured quite enough.

We stopped at another BP station to ask what we should do to circumvent the accident site (the stinkiest station ever, according to Nathaniel, who said he breathed through his mouth the whole time we were in there. I wish I'd thought of that.)

The convenience store clerk told me three things that he intended to be helpful. I will now itemize them for you and state their degree of helpfulness:

1. Traffic is backed up for at least four miles in each direction because of a huge accident. Degree of helpfulness: 0%. We already knew it was backed up too long for us to wait it out. We also figured it was because of an accident. Although he delivered the news to me in what sounded like an excited roving reporter's heavily accented English, it in fact helped us to no degree at all.

2. All of these people are going the same place you are. Take a left out of the parking lot and follow them, and they will take you back to I-20. Degree of helpfulness: 0%. Although I would likely have been resigned to this idea myself since we don't have GPS, historically I have proven to be about 80% more accurate with my own sense of direction than those around me are. Therefore, I didn't want to follow a bunch of Least Common Denominators around the Georgia countryside all evening. When I asked for more clarification than "Follow those dummies," I got:

3. Don't worry. The state police have got cops stationed all along the alternate route. Degree of helpfulness: 0%, BECAUSE THIS WAS AN OUTRIGHT LIE.


At any rate, we took off cross-country to try to get around the accident. A mile down the road, we came to a four-way stop. Two of the cars in front of us went straight. Two turned left. One turned right. SO MUCH FOR HELPFUL TIP #2. Grayson, manning our Map of Georgia, told me to turn left. He was very proud of himself, so I feel that I must mention his Map Prowess. Although it was the logical turn to make in order to make a complete loop and end up back at the highway. But THANKS, SWEETIE! You're my hero.

After we completed our left turn, we were greeted by endless fields and skies.



Am I going to bore you with a step-by-step account of our detour? YES I AM. We're not at the beach anymore, Dorothy.



At any rate, it's rare that we ever take a break from the interstates to visit some of our rural neighbors, so this was a more-than-welcome reprieve from the traffic jam on I-20.



JUST LOOK AT ALL THE RURAL GOODNESS. The farmers were even watering their crops. Or grass. Or whatever. CLEARLY I AM THE REASON THEY'RE GOING BANKRUPT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY FARM. But I do know whatever it is, it's well-watered. And it isn't slanted, but as is the case with most all of these pictures, I was taking them at 55 miles per hour, so frankly we should all just be happy they're not upside-down.



Soon enough we caught up with some of our friends from BP.



Nathaniel and I met this car's occupants in the bathroom. They were headed to Meridian, Miss. They had Eastern European accents, with nary a twinge of Southern. Neither they nor we saw any state troopers or any other moderately helpful souls during our detour. SO MUCH FOR HELPFUL TIP #3.



After about 10 minutes, we looped back around to I-20 and -- lo and behold -- we'd bypassed the accident scene by about a mile. Woot woot! Clear in both directions.



We finally made it to Atlanta to stay for the night a mere 10 hours after leaving the beach. SHEESH. I arrived with a migraine (that I'd started getting during The Detour) and Grayson took charge of the boys so that I could medicate, rest up and recover by morning.

Yesterday morning they let me sleep in. Praise God and Hallelujah. They played outside for a while before it got too stinking hot to enjoy the day. Jake, as usual, was pantsless.



He chased the Big Boys up and down the driveway as they rode their unmotorized "motorcycles." His trusty thighs were there once again to assist. (As I type this, I am struck by how much better color I get with the cheap point-and-shoot Canon than with the Very Expensive Canon that took me 12 months to pay off.)



Nathaniel has outgrown his motorcycle, but they have so much fun on them that he makes himself fit.



The other thing they love to do is climb trees. While they were climbing a good one yesterday morning at my parents' house, Nick slipped and scraped himself all the way down his chest and arms.



It was a really nasty set of scrapes. He wanted me to take pictures so I could send them to Aunt Debbie, "because she's a nurse." So Aunt Debbie, when you see this, please send Nick an e-mail to tell him how serious it looks.



Grayson cleaned it well, then applied Neosporin and bandages. Nick said, "My arm hurts worse than my tummy." Surprising, since the scratches on his arm are barely visible, but I think he just doesn't want us to forget about them.



After packing up to leave and grabbing lunch at Fuddrucker's on the way out of town, we hit the road. I didn't need the "Welcome to Alabama" sign on I-20 or complete and utter lack of cell phone coverage in the Talladega National Forest to tell me that we'd entered our home state. My temperature gauge told me when we got here. This was around the state line. Pay no attention to the speedometer part of this picture.



This was about 25 miles from home.



Jake managed to stay awake until we were five minutes from home. Then he started with the heavy blinks and kept trying to fall asleep. Here, Grayson was tickling him to keep him awake. I was taking pictures over my shoulder. Thank goodness for digital, when you can just fling it over your shoulder, click without looking, then check to see if you got a good shot. LOOK HOW JUICY THAT KID IS. He's just full of juice in those legs. I could eat him up with a spoon.


We arrived home in the late afternoon and spent the rest of the evening re-stocking the pantry and fridge, unpacking and starting massive amounts of laundry.

My sister is coming in from Wyoming to visit for a week, and we are SO EXCITED! I'm not sure I'll get to post every day that she's here, but hopefully I'll have some pictures and stories to share periodically.

We're glad to be home!

Goodbye, beach.

It's time to say goodbye to the big white house with the red tin roof.

Goodbye to 13 cousins on the beach, reveling in their crab T-shirts.

Goodbye to huge smiles at the end of a long day full of sand and surf.

Goodbye to pictures full of grandparents and grandchildren crowding together for one last picture on the beach.

Goodbye to racing down the beach to an invisible finish line, turning around only at the persistent chorus of parents beckoning them back.

Goodbye to babies sitting in the sand, wistfully watching the action and wishing they were old enough to be a part of it all. Next year, baby, next year.

Goodbye to long walks down the beach after delicious home-cooked meals, time for reflecting upon the joys the day brought.

Goodbye to toddlers racing away from their parents, running to the crashing waves, dry clothes be darned.

Goodbye to baby's first beach trip, first sand in the eyes, in the hair, in the pants, in the toes.

Goodbye, beach. Until next year.

And now, we mourn the end of the week

Please join me in a moment of silence as we observe the end of Beach Week '09.

Today was a little different than the rest of the week. SHOCKING, I KNOW. Jake developed a cough a couple of days ago, and he kept me awake most of the night because he was sleeping with his very active feet in my ribs. For those of you who regularly share a double bed with a spouse and a wiggly, coughing 15-month-old, I salute you. I handled it OK at the time for Jake's sake, but the rest of the day was set to the soundtrack of I'm So Tired I Want to Die. Do ditty dum do do ditty ditty dum.

Given our lack of sleep and subsequent lack of family-friendly personalities, Jake and I took a break from the beach today. We took a trip five minutes down the road to Kroger to get some cough medicine, and then came back and stayed inside the rest of the day. "Staying inside," to Jakey, is synonymous with "Making a break for the steps and seeing how many I can climb before Mommy catches me." It went on aaaaaalllllllllll day.

At lunch, we celebrated Bill's birthday. He is several candles old. The kids loved singing to him and helping him blow out the candles. I'm happy to report that the smoke detectors didn't go off.

Late this evening after supper, we took pictures of most of the kids with our "We Love Jonah" magnets. They have all been so excited to spend this week with him, celebrating his triumph over EB and his lust for life.

SPEAKING OF the little superstar, last night we spent about 15 minutes taking pictures of him, Matt and Patrice on the beach. It was wonderful to see how he enjoyed being in the breezy air, peaceful and happy as he could be.

Throughout the week we've taken lots of pictures of the individual families. IT TAKES A VILLAGE, PEOPLE. In some cases, it was just me and the parents. In others, it was me, the parents and the grandparents. And at one point a couple of days ago, I turned around from shooting a few and saw THIS, the Parental Paparazzi-turned-Entertainers, in all its glory.

They were apparently trying to get pictures of another set of kids, and they were giving it all they had.


And now I'll share a few of the shots of the families that are with us. Here are the Wheelers, of Florida.

These are their kids, Charlie, Anna Kate and Jack. Jack is like Jack-Jack in The Incredibles. He's super-fast and full of energy. The fact that he's not blurred out with movement in this picture is a triumph in itself.

Here are the Schwartzes of North Carolina.

I love this picture of Mikey and Ali because it looks like he cracked himself up and she's laughing at what he said. Such sweet siblings.

Coleman had to be manhandled to within an inch of his life to be kept from racing into the ocean every chance he got. A lot of my pictures included Heather dashing to catch him before he tumbled down the sand into the water.

These are the Tucker kids of New York. Grant, Abby and Will are always willing to pose. We didn't get a family picture this year because Andrew was feeling puny on picture days.

All in all, we got some good ones this year.

Now it's time to start packing up, comparing our purchased grocery list to groceries actually consumed so that we can better prepare for next year, and settling up with each other for expenses so we're all Even Steven. The markers of the end of the vacation. Oh, and let's not forget getting up sinfully early so we can be out of the house and have the keys returned by 10 a.m.

Then all that's left is the long drive home.

'I can't see Patrice's blog! I can't see Patrice's blog!'

I know a lot of you have either found me through Patrice or have found her through me, and we are WELL AWARE that some people have had zero luck viewing her blog this week. I AM ONE OF YOU. GOOD EVENING, FRIENDS AND COUNTRYMEN.

It doesn't appear to be a problem with her blog, as she has been able to post regularly and most people are still able to view it normally. She has also been receiving Comments normally, but lots of us have had issues being able to pull the blog up at all.

The best solution -- as far as we can tell from people who've let us know -- is to first try the Universal PC Fix known as REBOOTING. If that doesn't work, some people have had luck upgrading their Internet Explorer to the latest version compatible with their PC or -- even better -- installing Firefox instead.

I feel your pain, and Patrice is frustrated by this issue, which she can't fix for you. She would have posted something on her blog herself, but since the people HAVING the issue aren't able to SEE the blog, you can understand how that would be counter-productive.

Good luck!

Trying to pretend it's not Thursday

SO, today is Thursday. As I noted yesterday, I'm lamenting the fact that our vacation is "practically over," meaning that we only have today and tomorrow left. Apparently my husband feels like that's PLENTY of time (see his Comment on yesterday's post), but I still can't get over the fact that we have far less time to enjoy than we've already spent here.

And I'd like to point out (since I feel like I have to defend myself BECAUSE MY HUSBAND COMMENTED PUBLICLY ON MY BLOG) that I'm not the only one who feels this way. My sister-in-law Patsy said she feels like I do, and tonight my father-in-law Rudy said, "This always feels like the fastest week of the year."

Once again, we spent the morning on the beach ... body surfing was the order of the day. Most days the waves have been rather unremarkable, but today they were really big. The current was also VERY strong, so we kept close tabs on them as they went out and came in, went out and came in.



Nick managed to catch this wave, but it dunked Nathaniel. That's he, sputtering in the background as Nick rides happily and obliviously to shore.

Here's Nathaniel waiting to catch the next Big One.

SUCCESS.

And now, two very quick videos of the body surfing. The first one is Nathaniel and Grant, and the second one is Nicholas and Grant, with Mikey biting it right at the very end.

I mentioned that we're closing in on the end of the week, in that we only have one day left on the beach. Perhaps less, if tomorrow shapes up like today, with strong winds and a downpour right after lunch that brought everyone inside.

The kids split up and played multiple games with willing adults. Witness:

Nothing I can say, no words I could use, could possibly convey to you the noise level in the house this afternoon. Still, note in the picture above that my husband is fully capable of sleeping through it all.

I wish I had a video clip to share instead of mere pictures, but all you would hear in the background of the video would be a roar not unlike the crowd noise you hear at a ballgame when a bat connects with a ball in the bottom of the 9th. I PROMISE.

THANKS, WEATHER.

I was going to try to post some of the family pictures we took today, but Blogger doesn't seem to want me to add any more pictures to this post. They'll have to come later.

The next time you hear from me will be ON OUR VERY LAST FULL DAY AT THE BEACH!

It's all downhill from Wednesday

I don't know if it's just me or not, but whenever I'm on vacation (like this one, annually) from Saturday to Saturday, I always enjoy the vacation the most mentally on Sunday and Monday.

On Tuesday I'm already thinking, "Tomorrow will be halfway. From then on, the glass is half empty." And on Wednesday, I'm thinking, "Our time here is halfway over. We're going to be so sad when it's time to pack just two days from now." And don't even get me STARTED about Thursday and Friday.

But I'm going to try -- for your sakes -- to keep my chin up in this Wednesday post.

Today we -- ALL TOGETHER NOW -- spent the morning on the beach. Got there early. Again. (Although I'm sure my boys will appreciate me telling you -- as they told me several times -- that they let me sleep an extra 15 minutes this morning. Thank you, boys.)

As always, we looked like a small city converging on our little stretch of beach and ocean.








There is usually some degree of gender separation at work on the beach. Here, Anna Kate and Abby are enjoying each other's company, stylin' in their monogrammed rash guards. Because what is the point, really, of even WEARING a rash guard if it isn't monogrammed? I can't think of one.

A little farther down the beach, someone has found a hole. I wish there was a song I could quote about finding a great hole on the beach, because if there were one, Jake would have been singing it when he spotted this one.

"I found a hole! I found a hole! Everybody! I found a hole. And I'm going to get in it. Alley oop!"

"Lowering, lowering, PIVOT, PIVOT, lowering ..."

"I'M IN. AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL."

After enjoying the hole, Jake made tracks (literally) into the ocean.

Shortly thereafter, I wished there was a song about finding a stick. Because if there were, I'd be quoting it here.

"Holy cow, guys! I FOUND A FREAKING STICK ON THE BEACH. THIS IS THE BEST BEACH EVER."

"I'm going to race down to the water with it. Once I get there, I have no idea what I'm going to do, but it seems like the right thing to do at the moment. I am only a baby. I don't think that far ahead."

"One thing I DO know is that it just feels right to puff out my chest and my thighs with pride as I carry my stick."

It wasn't long before Jake adopted the worldwide symbol of Baby's First Trip to the Beach: the sandy face.

It was epic in its intensity. Snot is a prerequisite.

The bigger kids were pretty much just running around with shovels. See: two photos below.

Perhaps shovels are the great unifying factor between the genders.

My brother-in-law's sister Melanie (also widely renowned as the 4th of July Program Director) spent part of the morning playing catch with Will and Ali.

Nick and Charlie enjoyed being buried up to their knees in the sand.

And Jake stayed busy, running back and forth to the ocean. (No wind today, by the way. The ocean was much calmer today than it's been all week.)

"OK, I'm bored of running back and forth to the ocean. Who shall entertain me? Nathaniel, please run toward me and then fall down in the sand and roll aimlessly. YES! JUST LIKE THAT! That is HILARIOUS."

"Why did you stop? I command you to do it again. And again. And again."

"THAT'S BETTER."

We also had another couple of exciting wildlife sightings today, although neither was as scary as the shark from yesterday.

In the picture below, you can "see" a dolphin fin in the upper center of the frame, to the right of the tourist boat.

And in THIS one, you can see the little ghost crab that found its way into our swimming pool. Big Jake rescued it and released it on the beach.

After I took Little Jake inside and gave him a bath, he enjoyed some quality time with G-daddy (Grayson's dad) in the den. They played with trucks and read a book.

Then, during naptime, a head-to-head Scrabble match of epic proportions took place. The concentration was impressive. It was a battle between Patrice and Adam, both Scrabble wizards.

In case Patrice wants to blog about it, I won't divulge the outcome.

Well played, lads, well played.

After supper, we spent an hour taking pictures of the different families on the beach. I'd thought I might post some tonight, but I took a LOT, and I need to weed through them. Perhaps tomorrow, to take my mind off the fact THAT IT WILL BE THURSDAY ALREADY.

Still having fun in the sun, or under the overcast sky ... one or the other

Today started out as the previous two days did, with all of us out on the beach at the crack of dawn. Yes, 9:30 is the crack of dawn.

The beach encampment was out in full force by that time, set up for full UV protection. The patch of blue sky you see on the right side of this photo is misleading ... it was overcast-to-drizzly most of the day.



Once again we took over the immediate beach area with our Many Loud Children. We had several exciting moments when a neighboring beachgoer shouted "SHARK!" And there really WAS a shark out there.




We all piled out of the water for several hours, as three or four of us saw the fin for ourselves. It looked DISTINCTLY different from the dolphin fins we've been seeing this week, which was more than a little unsettling. We were irritated that neighbors on both sides of us were fishing with what looked like deep-sea fishing poles and big, live bait. It seemed like they were inviting the sharks over to join us.

One nice thing about being in from the ocean was that the kids did a lot of fun things in the sand. Charlie, Mikey, Grant and Nathaniel dug a big hole.

Jake scouted for shells, thousands of which were brought in by the storm waves last night.

He was NOT all that impressed with all of the shells that he found.

But he kept digging for them anyway, in his classic legs-crossed pose. (He sits this way all the time ... in his car seat, in his high chair, on the floor, and -- apparently -- on the beach.)

For a brief while, Nick rode his body board on the waves.

He's fearless, but ultimately there were a couple of more sightings of the shark fin, so we got back out of the water for good. No sense in ruining a perfectly good vacation with a fatality or limb loss.

"Wow, that's terrible. I guess you never saw it coming."

"Well, actually we knew it was out there, but we were pretty sure it wouldn't get us."

"IDIOTS."

I didn't want THAT conversation to happen EVER -- especially not on The Today Show or something -- so we played it safe.

We had a little more excitement when an eel washed up right in front of us. All of the kids were FASCINATED. I thought it was kind of gross, but it beats a shark bite any day.

The unavailability of the ocean inspired me to start building a fort with Nathaniel and Nick.

My plan is to now subject you to multiple remarkably similar pictures of it, in order to properly demonstrate my immense pride in my handiwork.

I garnered many Awesome Mommy Points for that creation. DUG BY HAND, if I didn't mention it. Not that I'm looking for credit or anything.

They were especially excited when I retired to my chair to let them play in it "all alone."

After lunch, we hit the pool, which is under the house. Well, half of it is under the house and half of it sticks out in the sun.

The kids all love the pool, and we've always loved it, too. But now that the kids are getting older, the pool seems to be shrinking. When half of them get in it with a couple of adults to supervise, it seems like it's only about the size of a hot tub.

But it remains a "main attraction" of the house. The kids flock to it. And speaking of main attractions that the kids flock to, check out Jonah's Pack-n-Play before supper tonight:

He was charming them all, and they were loving every minute of it. They were doing everything they could to try to make him smile and laugh.

And he was having a really happy evening! He was cooing and smiling at them like a champ.

We wrapped up our day with a delicious meal and a very patriotic dessert ... cheesecake.

More pictures and stories to come as the week continues ...

The fun continues

Our second full day at the beach went really well. I'm trying not to fill my memory card up with hundreds of pictures of children playing in the sand and the waves, but trust me when I say that there are MANY CHILDREN having LOTS OF FUN playing in the sand and in the waves. We've even had a few pods of dolphins pass in front of us, which has been really exciting.

I know I've mentioned before how many family members we have with us ... there are MANY. Today is the day we'd set aside for our annual family picture with everyone in red, white and blue. Behold:

And now for a few shots of several of the family members ... here are Ali and Adam on the back porch. Their family is very photogenic ... always has been.

Next up are Tiffany and Gary and their kids, Charlie, Anna Kate and Jack. Tiffany is Grayson's niece, and she's two months older than I. They are the apples of one of my reader's eyes (Hi, Beverly!)

Of course I can't let a day go by without attempting to get a cute, put-together picture of my boys, preferably all facing the same direction ... even if not right at the camera. Some days I am successful. Today was not one of those days.

I was willing to settle for one of them looking out at the beach. That didn't work out exactly as planned, either. I got one ...

And I wanted to get a few more. But the baby had other plans. "No more pictures. I'm coming for you, Mommy. Right now."

"Here I am!"

This was also the evening that we celebrate all of the kids' birthdays together. Since they don't (for the most part) get to attend each others' birthday parties, we always have one big party at the beach. Patsy distributed hats. Nathaniel loved his.

Abby loved hers.

Will was a big fan of his. As a matter of fact, he asked for TWO!

SOME PEOPLE seemed to be offended by the party hats. Maybe it was just the elastic chin strap.

Eventually he was able to pull it together. But not without a face that clearly said, "YOU ARE REALLY PUSHING THE LIMITS OF MY EASYGOING PERSONALITY."

With paci in mouth, though, he was good to go for the duration of the party. Well, almost. He finally melted down completely around 8:00 and had to go to bed before all the presents were distributed.

Nonetheless, all the kids loved the cake and ice cream, and much fun was had.

So, we're chalking the evening up to a grand success. And all I want to say about this next picture is, my sister-in-law has a problem. A big problem. This stash should get her through Thursday. After that, all bets are off.

My only complaint for the week thus far concerns the unfortunate fiberglass surround in the shower. For whatever reason, it slants inward toward the tub, which means whatever you place on it falls to the floor. POTENTIALLY ONTO YOUR TOES. Not such a big problem with a travel-size bar of soap, but a huge problem when you're dealing with a huge bottle of Biolage shampoo or Johnson & Johnson baby wash.

So far everything else is lots of fun, and we're hoping that the thunderstorms continue to roll in just at night, as they have so far. We've been lucky that they've passed us by during daylight hours.

Just another day in paradise

*** I apologize for the text formatting in this post. This is one that I can't seem to get to post correctly, and I'm going to have to let it go. CURSES. ***


Day Two at the beach is complete ... and what a day it was. We were out on the sand by 9:40. That's A-M. OBSCENE. We were all set up, complete with beach umbrellas and Many Loud Children.



In the background of the picture above, you can see our rental house, which has to be Large and In Charge to house 19 adults and 13 children. It pretty much dwarfs (I want to type dwarves) the houses around it, but we are lucky to have found one that holds us all.

We take over most of the space directly in front of the house with all of our Stuff, and the kids have free reign of the area ... because we're in an area of residential homes as opposed to multi-story condos, the beach generally isn't crowded, even on a holiday week like this.



The kids, although they only play together a couple of times a year, really get along well and play happily together. Not counting the occasional bucket of water over the head.

Most of the time we look just like a really large family, and other times we look like crazy people running around wielding shovels.

This is Jake's first trip to the beach. Well, he came with us last year, but he HATED being on the beach. I think I spent more time on the beach today than I spent on the beach during the whole WEEK last year ... he hated the way the wind took his breath away, the noise of the waves, pretty much everything about it. I guess I can't blame him ... he was only 11 weeks old.

THIS year is a completely different story. He loved it from the first minute we set him down on the sand this morning.

"Hmmmm. Water ... and some dirt-like substance. I LOVE IT ALREADY."

"That's right, peeps. I'm in the water. At the beach. Eat your hearts out."

"I think I want to eat some of this dirt-like stuff."

"Note to future self: it LOOKS better than it TASTES."

When we went inside for lunch, guess who was waiting for us:

Sweet baby Jonah. He seems to be enjoying being around so many people who love him, but he hasn't made it out to the beach yet. We hope to get him out there and get some family pictures with him by the end of the week.

I told Patrice that I think his hands are looking pretty good ... they aren't swelling too badly and they don't have many blisters. What precious little hands.

He spent some good, quality time with Matt and Patrice today, hanging out in the sunny living room.

Here are the Wonder Twins, as I think of them ...

After lunch most of us headed back out to the beach for a while. Coleman, who is just a couple of months younger than Jake, loved it as much as Jakey did.

My three boys spent a limited amount of time together, because for the most part, the big boys left me and Jakey in their dust. It took me five minutes just to corral them for this picture.

I managed to get off a couple of shots before they dashed off for the waves. Even right here, Nathaniel was shouting, "JAKE, I'M ABOUT TO GO JUMP THOSE WAVES. WANNA COME?"

Beverly W., this one's for you! Here's sweet Charlie hanging out on the beach.

Jack, Charlie's younger brother, hung out mostly by the beach encampment near the house, but he came down to visit with me and Jake a few times.

Will also hung out a lot up near Beach Chair Central, cool in his cap and shades.

And Ali, sweet Ali, is always a ham for the camera.

And while Jonah was doing THIS inside:

Matt and Patrice got to do THIS outside:

Apparently they had nothing to talk about other than the weather and what Jonah was doing during their precious Beach Time. WELCOME TO BEING AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE, GUYS.

Here's about a third of our motley crew eating supper. There are two tables this large (I think they each seat 10) in the eat-in kitchen and dining area adjacent to it, which is great for our group. We have folding tables and chairs for the kiddos, but this evening some of the adults ate in the den on the couches and chairs. (Must have been something captivating on TV.)

After supper, the women made the annual Epic Wal-Mart Trip. Traditionally we go the night we arrive, but since yesterday was the 4th, we had take-out for supper and waited until tonight to go to Wal-Mart. THEY WERE WIPED OUT. But on the plus side, we were only there for 90 minutes (as opposed to the usual 3.5 to 4 hours).

I'd already found most of what I needed and knocked everything off my list when I fortuitously ran into Patsy in Women's Sportswear. I said, "Hey, I'm just going to run down here and check again for the boogey board Nick wants. I'll be up to pay in a minute."

About three minutes passed while I was scouring the rows one last time. Then, over the loudspeakers, I heard, "KATHERINE, PLEASE MEET YOUR PARTY AT THE FRONT OF THE STORE."

And I should not have to tell you that I broke out into an embarrassed sweat right there in Beach Toys. OH NO THEY DID NOT JUST HAVE ME PAGED IN THE MYRTLE BEACH WAL-MART. You have never seen a short woman move such a loaded cart through Wal-Mart at such a high pace. I was operating on pure adrenaline.

As it turns out, they hadn't paged me, after all. Someone ELSE paged some other Katherine to meet her large party at the front. In other words, ALL THAT FLOP SWEAT WAS IN VAIN.

At any rate, here we are with our goods (a light load because some of the shopping was done beforehand this year):

And no, I am NOT ABOVE asking a total stranger to take a picture of eight women with groceries.

We left quickly so as to beat the rain that was approaching.

I felt like they should have been playing Clarke's Trumpet Voluntary or some other kind of triumphant recessional over the PA system as we left. What a letdown that they didn't.

So now we're back home, safe and sound, ready for whatever tomorrow brings. Which we hope isn't rain. Which there's a 30% chance of.

Lord have mercy.

Happy 4th to one and all

So we arrived at the beach today, as I mentioned earlier. LOTS OF PEOPLE HERE. Coleman (on the left, below) and Jake wanted so badly to get out on the beach with the older kids. They stood at the back door like two little bichon frises, hopping around, hoping to be let out.



They were so excited to be here, and we were ALL excited to be here with THIS little guy: the rock star known as Jonah!



There was lots of July 4th fun to be had all afternoon and evening. Here are my sister- and brother-in-law Debbie and Gerry holding Jonah and Jake during the July 4th "show" put on by the kids.

And speaking of THE SHOW, here's a glimpse ... my brother-in-law's sister Melanie (got that?) puts it together every year, and it's adorable. Even the babies get to participate ... well, the ones who are awake. Coleman -- just a couple of months younger than Jake -- hit the sack before it ever got started this year, so he missed it. Still, the 12 who took part in it were adorable.

The girls -- our ladies of liberty -- shined in particular this year. That's Anna Kate, Ali and Abby, from left to right.

And no children's production is complete without the Parental Paparazzi hovering nearby.

Jakey had so much fun all evening long ... from the hamburger supper to the party out on the porch, he was in fine form.

Oh, and I have to include this one just because I think it's the first shot I've gotten of his TOP TEETH. He has four on top and two on bottom now.

We typically have the boys drink milk or juice at home, but sometimes they get a special treat of Caffeine-free Diet Coke. And boy, do we love our Coke products. This evening was a special-treat kind of time.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...."

And although the youngest of our brood can't get a Coke product to save his life, he loves to THINK that he can.

"I want one, and I plan to have one. Watch me."

"Look, I want it so badly, I'll turn on my really cute face."

And then he grabbed one and turned it up like an old pro. Too bad the top was sealed. Other than that, he looked like he was downing it in one gulp.

After our meal and the kids' show were complete, we enjoyed fireworks under the moonlight. I took some pictures of the fireworks, but they're terrible. Here's a passable one of the moon.

Goodnight!

And don't forget to check out ...

Bakerella did her usual bang-up job on baked goods for the 4th.

Swing by and check it out!

Vacationing with Grumpy McGrumpyton

We have arrived at the beach. We've been here for about four hours, and the big boys have already been in the ocean and the pool, and we enjoyed our take-out hamburgers. Jakey just went down to bed.

I wish I had some pictures to share of all of the chaos that has already ensued, but I haven't managed to get that far yet. Hopefully the memory card reader I bought for this express purpose will work. If not, we're in for a long week of pictureless posts.

During the long car trip spread over two days, Nicholas was pretty perturbed.

Me: "Hey, boys. Tonight we're going to go a little farther than we'd planned, so guess what THAT means. It means we're going to spend the night in a HOTEL, and you've been looking forward to that for a long time."

Nathaniel: "Yea!!"

Nick: "WELL I HAVEN'T BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT AT ALL."


And later ...

Me: "OK, boys. We're about to stop for supper. Let's eat at Chick-fil-A."

Nathaniel: "Yea!! I LOVE Chick-fil-A."

Nick: "I DON'T. I WANT TO EAT AT WAFFLE HOUSE."


And yesterday while at Grayson's sister's house ...

Nick [to Grayson's sister]: "Aunt Debbie, I have a present for you."

and then to Grayson: "AND NONE FOR YOU."


But as I said, we've arrived, and we just enjoyed the annual patriotic program put on by [loyal reader] Aunt Melanie. (Hi, Melanie!) I hope to have pictures of that shortly.

Happy 4th of July to all! Be back soon.

Further proof that he has my DNA

Some of my co-workers have a habit of calling me on every word that I use that they've never heard before. Sometimes it's one a week, sometimes I get on a real tear and they'll ask me about two in one lunch outing.

One day last year I think I said something like, "Grayson's so irritated with the dry cleaner because they returned one of his shirts with a huge wrinkle right across the placket." And everyone was like, "What the heck is a placket?" Which I think you might agree is not that obscure of a word, but maybe it is. I don't know. It refers to the "opening or slit at the top of a shirt that facilitates putting it on and taking it off." Some clothiers also refer to it as the "button placket," that thicker strip of fabric where the buttons lay. At any rate, it's not like I say it all the time, just when it's the right word for the situation. I certainly don't MAKE UP reasons to use it. (And I am typing this like I'm being defensive, which I'm not trying to be. I don't know why that is.)

So anyway, last night Nathaniel was talking about his tennis shoes:

Nathaniel: "Since my shoes have Velcro, I don't have aglets."

Me: "What are aglets?"

Nathaniel: "They're the little plastic things on the end of shoelaces."

Me: "Seriously? I've never heard that word before. Where did you hear it?"

Nathaniel: "On Phineus and Ferb. They sang a song about it."

So we have The Disney Channel to thank for that little nugget. And I couldn't be more pleased.


*** ON ANOTHER NOTE ***

We're traveling today, and I'm not sure how long it will be until I can get set up to post again. I don't know how easy it will be to post from Debbie and Gerry's house (Jonah's grandparents and my sister- and brother-in-law), but I know I'll have wireless Internet at the beach. Rest assured, I'll be back soon! I will have plenty of pictures and stories to tell before we hit the beach, while we're at the beach, and once we get back.

Talk to you soon!

Just when you thought you were safe, I drag you back in

Well, it's officially out with the old ...



and in with the new!



It is BEAUTIFUL. It reminds me of a '57 Chevy or something, with its beautiful lines and elegant script logo.



I have to admit, when I turned the corner this evening after work to check it out, I think I sort of thought it would be fire-engine red and have racing stripes or something. I thought it would look more like it was saying, "That's riiiiiiiight, little lady. Four thousand smackaroos, AND DON'T I LOOK GREAT BETWEEN YOUR SHRUBS?"



But it's rather unassuming, actually. It DOES look nicer than our other unit, which is still kicking along at more than a decade old. The one on the right cools our main level and basement, and it's actually a few years OLDER than the dud we just had to replace. So I want to coddle it, love on it, hold an umbrella over its head when it rains. I stood in the side yard this evening and begged it, "Please, please, little main-level-and-basement unit ... please keep on ticking for several more years. We need you."



So after I got done talking to my air conditioners, I hurried inside to see if I could breathe upstairs. And lo and behold ...


All is right with the world. Well, all is COOLER, anyway. And all is DIGITAL. Veddy nice. I likee. I enjoyed my first 69-degree bedtime in three nights last night, just as the Lord intended.

Peace out.